Your Wife/Girlfriend/partner are away.


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Daytime drinking. Cigars. Pizza or curry. Shame. Guilt chores.  

1. Change all the locks.  End of list. 

Eat everything I can’t possibly eat without getting “those” looks. It’s just not worth it . And spend time with guys I can’t spend time with cos “don’t you like spending time with me” is also not wor

Just now, awkwardPause said:

 


That, too. Just bore medium-sized hole in said ham and dump in your favorite rum. Patch that hole up with bacon. Bake. Have rum rum to celebrate. Enjoy. ;)

 

Just don’t get lost at sea...

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7 hours ago, Jfeath74 said:

The above post on a impromptu trip to Cuba is something I’ve researched multiple times when my wife leaves... One of these days I will pull the trigger!

That statement can be read a couple of ways ... a bit worrying!

:P

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4 hours ago, GasGuy82 said:

Best thing my father ever did was advise me to be fair, but set-up ground rules. I look sadly upon some of my friend's marriages where they get run over. I'm mindful to do my part and be an equal partner in my marriage, but if I say I'm going to go do something, that's what I'm doing. She doesn't worry about when I'm coming home (I always do). I'll go hunting with my buddies and their wives are already pinging them by 8:30AM because she wants to go to the gym or something. I tell my wife and she just says, "you told me you were going hunting". If I'm going to be back really late in the day for some reason, I'll be courteous and call, but for the most part, we respect each others space. Conversely, I'm not keeping track of where she is or what she is doing if she tells me she is going out for the day or with the girls.

 

Separate bank accounts.  I have friends who tell me I'm an ass or that I treat my wife like an employee, but we have separate bank accounts.  If she spends a ghastly amount on something, that's her problem.  Out of sight, out of mind.

 

She sees my humidor, she knows I too am a sucker for a shiny toy.  

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The local craft beer pub is putting on all the Founder's Stouts on tap on Saturday. Opens at 12 noon. A big roast lunch and my fav stout with a good mate. Then back home to sit on the balcony and enjoy more craft beer or maybe some port and, of course, a cigar - thinking Lusi. Then watch my Tigers play in the AFL at another local pub. That's Saturday sorted. Oh wait, that's what I'll probably do anyway...if I get permission from the little boss. Sunday, steak and eggs for breakfast and another stout then watch more AFL while trying to recover on the couch.

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On 7/9/2018 at 9:03 PM, luckme10 said:

Tis a shame abalone season was cancelled this year.  But I'd still go take my spear gun and go free diving along mendocino coast. Or maybe take the rod and go flyfishing on the stanislaus.

Nice to see another NorCal outdoorsman! Shame about the kelp forests, the urchins are brutal right now. I’m a huge ocean fishermen and would spend every waking minute out fishing on my boat out of Bodega Bay, killing fish and smoking cigars ?

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20 hours ago, GasGuy82 said:

Best thing my father ever did was advise me to be fair, but set-up ground rules. I look sadly upon some of my friend's marriages where they get run over. I'm mindful to do my part and be an equal partner in my marriage, but if I say I'm going to go do something, that's what I'm doing. She doesn't worry about when I'm coming home (I always do). I'll go hunting with my buddies and their wives are already pinging them by 8:30AM because she wants to go to the gym or something. I tell my wife and she just says, "you told me you were going hunting". If I'm going to be back really late in the day for some reason, I'll be courteous and call, but for the most part, we respect each others space. Conversely, I'm not keeping track of where she is or what she is doing if she tells me she is going out for the day or with the girls.

 

 

Absolutely. I tell guys getting married the same thing and see how miserable some of my friends are that didn't set the same ground rules. 

 

15 hours ago, JohnInCleveland said:

Separate bank accounts.  I have friends who tell me I'm an ass or that I treat my wife like an employee, but we have separate bank accounts.  If she spends a ghastly amount on something, that's her problem.  Out of sight, out of mind.

 

She sees my humidor, she knows I too am a sucker for a shiny toy.  

 

John that's the one mistake I made. I'm just lucky my wife is very very very low maintenance. I spend enough for both of us.

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So some guys do get run over by a controlling wife.  It's awful to watch.  When I meet people about to get married I always give the soon to be husband the same advice. "Always," I say, " do everything your wife asks you to do. Never, ever, do it right away." If the soon to be wife's mother is close by I take a step back.

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4 hours ago, joeypots said:

So some guys do get run over by a controlling wife.  It's awful to watch.  When I meet people about to get married I always give the soon to be husband the same advice. "Always," I say, " do everything your wife asks you to do. Never, ever, do it right away." If the soon to be wife's mother is close by I take a step back.

And when she asks you to do the shopping, do it ... but make sure you get things just a little bit wrong.  Not the right sort of laundry detergent, the wrong brand of toothpaste, the wrong kind of lettuce, that sort of thing.  She may ask you to do the groceries a second time, so repeat the process.

She won't ask you a third time.

 

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7 minutes ago, gweilgi said:

And when she asks you to do the shopping, do it ... but make sure you get things just a little bit wrong.  Not the right sort of laundry detergent, the wrong brand of toothpaste, the wrong kind of lettuce, that sort of thing.  She may ask you to do the groceries a second time, so repeat the process.

She won't ask you a third time.

 

now i am the very last person able to give any advice on marriage but if i understand these posts correctly, they can be basically boiled down to this - "piss off the person with whom you have chosen to spend the rest of your life, slowly but surely". ever thought that women might not be quite so stupid and that perhaps they find ways to do exactly the same? 

beyond me why something like a third to half of all marriages end in divorce. 

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2 hours ago, Ken Gargett said:

now i am the very last person able to give any advice on marriage but if i understand these posts correctly, they can be basically boiled down to this - "piss off the person with whom you have chosen to spend the rest of your life, slowly but surely". ever thought that women might not be quite so stupid and that perhaps they find ways to do exactly the same? 

beyond me why something like a third to half of all marriages end in divorce. 

My wife are both photographers and made an agreement long ago not to sugar our opinions on each others’ work.  It just does not help with artistic growth!  I think from this we pretty much just decide to tell it straight up on everything else too.  Not always the best thing for moral, especially when you really put everything into a project only to learn it’s shit, but certainly keeps things realistic.  

Makes me think about the “Every Loves Raymond” episode where the parents explain they just tell each to shut up from time to time ... to every ones’ surprise. 

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now i am the very last person able to give any advice on marriage but if i understand these posts correctly, they can be basically boiled down to this - "piss off the person with whom you have chosen to spend the rest of your life, slowly but surely". ever thought that women might not be quite so stupid and that perhaps they find ways to do exactly the same? 
beyond me why something like a third to half of all marriages end in divorce. 

I’m with Ken on this one.

What a stupid passive-aggressive move.
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4 hours ago, Ken Gargett said:

now i am the very last person able to give any advice on marriage but if i understand these posts correctly, they can be basically boiled down to this - "piss off the person with whom you have chosen to spend the rest of your life, slowly but surely". ever thought that women might not be quite so stupid and that perhaps they find ways to do exactly the same? 

beyond me why something like a third to half of all marriages end in divorce. 

And you may find something more than just Sweet'N Low in your morning coffee.

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11 hours ago, Ken Gargett said:

now i am the very last person able to give any advice on marriage but if i understand these posts correctly, they can be basically boiled down to this - "piss off the person with whom you have chosen to spend the rest of your life, slowly but surely". ever thought that women might not be quite so stupid and that perhaps they find ways to do exactly the same? 

beyond me why something like a third to half of all marriages end in divorce. 

Easy fellas. I'm writing tongue in cheek.  In all seriousness here is the best marriage advice I can give. GIVE IN.

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On 7/10/2018 at 4:57 AM, scap99 said:

Ha!  This happened last weekend.  She loaded up and left Friday morning and didn't get back until Monday afternoon.

 

I smoked cigars all day Saturday. 

Grilled some fajitas. 

Ate and drank too much, then had a cigar smoking buddy come over and we hung out on the back porch "Ken and Rob" style.

 

Exactly! Nothing crazy. Have football, baseball or basketball on the TV without interruption. Maybe even take an afternoon nap. Probably sub steaks for fajitas & snore all night without repercussions.

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On 7/9/2018 at 11:13 PM, El Presidente said:

Hopefully not away together as that would spell disaster :rolleyes:

...and lets not limit this to blokes either. Our fair forum goddesses can also chime in. 

So your better half leaves this Friday lunch time for 3 days away to be with her family/friends "interstate".  If you have kids, they are taking them :spotlight:

They are back Monday morning. 

 

You are master of your domain for 50 hours or so. 

List the Top  things that you would do....or would love to do. Treat yourself. B)

 

@El Presidente you just nailed my weekend. Wife took off to see her dad and I'm home alone until Monday morning. I'm either very boring or have a great wife because I'm going to do exactly what I would do if she was home. I'm going to finish fixing the drainage problems at our new home, I'm going to cook a bunch of stuff on my new grill, smoke  a few cigars on the back deck, cuddle with my puppies. Good times, except for the 90° F weather, but I guess I'll be working early and napping through the afternoon.IMG_1714.thumb.JPG.53324709df913df0db19fc20044863c0.JPGIMG_1715.thumb.JPG.439766f0c8c0c398075284f724c4202e.JPGIMG_1716.thumb.JPG.972ea727dc61aca33ce5f8e7434bc4fe.JPGIMG_1717.thumb.JPG.9d718e69a4d14c55ac128a26e1577f13.JPGIMG_1719.thumb.JPG.60d98817fdd27499563bb708f034b370.JPGIMG_1718.thumb.JPG.0fb0f0b847cd30cc8fef4711e87f3e9c.JPG

If anyone can believe it I actually got my wife to help dig some. Yes I have proof: 

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The new grill: Napoleon LEX with infrared side burner and infared rotisserie cooker. Thanksgiving just got real easy for me. 

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