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1 hour ago, Ken Gargett said:

and with respect, do you really want to poke the relationship bear? 

Tunnel Bear?

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Met current partner on well known app.  Dated several from online post divorce.  I dunno, just sort of seems like how it's done nowadays.  Certainly easier to get to see things about a person before contacting as opposed to sidling up to a candidate at the bar and asking why on earth they'd drink tequila lol.

I sort of enjoy seeing Ken on his back deck listening to his Bruce, smoking, drinking, and busting balls with El Pres.  If current relationship ever ends I may well just do full on 3 Stooges Women Hater club lol.  A life of golf, fishing, cigars, good drinks and good friends.

Who am I kidding, I like women too much lol

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I found my amazing wife on OKCupid. 

I told everyone "The odds are good, but the goods are odd".

It was fun, but expensive to take women out 2-3x a week. 

I never had any issues finding anyone to date in real life, but it was fun to go online shopping for a new squeeze!

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Have a few friends who have gotten married to people they met through online dating!

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I meant my fiancé online and now we are getting married. I tried free ones(tinder,bumble, plenty of fish), waste of time. Paid site (match.com) worked out pretty good for me, I was going on dates every week. Didn’t really end up spending that much money as most of the dates I went on initiated 50/50 split on the bill and that’s perfectly fine with me. You are essentially meeting a person for the first time and there is a pretty good chance you might not hit it off . On my profile I was up front about smoking cigars, and just honest about everything in general. I’m not 18 where I need to impress someone, it is what it is accept me or not. I think my key to success was cutting the online chatting to the minimum. Few exchanges of messages and lets go on a date, always suggesting meeting in a public place. A lot of women like that, apparently there is a lot of guys out there that just on on for weeks on months chatting online before actually making a move to go on a date. That can be bad for two reasons, one you can potentially be wasting time as anyone can seem different behind the keyboard than in real life and two you end up talking about everything online and then by the first date you have used up a lot of good conversations. One date per week, if it’s not good start setting up for the next week.


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Online dating worked for me and I’m now a happily married man, but it took a lot of work and a bit of good luck/fortune to get there. 

I hit the online dating scene five years ago  after my first marriage ended, usually averaging about one date per week. The quality of women varied significantly for me (as it surely must for them also). There were lies and omissions about appearance, age, and marital status (actually divorced versus only separated) that I had to deal with. 

After numerous low-quality dates early on, I decided to only meet up with women who successfully passed the “phone call test”. Very unusual in this age of texting only, but this screened out about 90% of the duds who couldn’t even pass muster on a 10 minute intro phone call to determine if a face-to-face was justified. 

I knew from our first meeting that my now-wife was different than the others.  We dated for two years and tied the knot on the second anniversary of our first date. We now have a 7 month old daughter and I’m a lucky and grateful man.

Bonus Fun Fact: when I first started the online dating experiment, I stumbled across my ex-wife’s profile, and it showed us as a 92% match! I nearly fell out of my chair, laughing! The site asked a lot of questions and gauges compatibility based on responses. Even better, she used an old picture from when we were together, and she cropped me out of the pic. That was MY arm around her! You can’t make this stuff up...

TL;DR summary: it worked for me and I wish you all the best if you choose this path!    

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2 hours ago, JamesKPolkEsq said:

I never had any issues finding anyone to date in real life, but it was fun to go online shopping for a new squeeze!

Well, neither did I, until recently. Unfortunately, It does get harder find good candidates as you get older.

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5 hours ago, KING BROWN said:

My experience:

Full of weidos / predators waiting in the shadows.

Too many just wanting a bonk and probably struggling to find satisfaction in the real world.

An on-line dating site is a honey pot attracting the vulnerable .... so much easier than getting dressed up, paying for a lot of booze, putting oneself 'out there' for limited / zero return.

In the end I struck it lucky, but the journey was 'entertaining' !

P.S. What's "grinder" .... High class dating ?

      Well first let me say that I'm glad I read all the responses first before making the response I planned to in the beginning. For those of you who successfully found a mate on a dating site I'm very elated for you. But in response to King Brown's comments - this is why we refer to dating sites as www.meetyourserialkiller.com.

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Online dating was still in its infancy when I met my wife (who I first met over breakfast at a B&B), so I've no real experience.

I hear good and bad from my single friends but I'm sometimes shocked at the statistics of the numbers of people who have met their partner that way.

Good on them, if it works it works.

At least things have moved on from this. I hope.

 

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If I had access to Tinder during my twenties in London I would have saved myself a lot of the hassle of going out on the prowl. 

 

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12 hours ago, Ken Gargett said:

do you really want to poke the relationship bear? 

Bloody hell. What site arranges that??

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I started with online dating during its infancy.  I had great success in bedding women and finding girlfriends/wife.  Dating online is taxing both financially and physically/emotionally.  It takes a lot of time and money going out on dates.  Half the time they're just looking for a free meal or drink; the other time they're crack pots looking for the guy that does not exist.  There are a lot of pro-dating women out there to just empty your wallet.  It can be difficult to be yourself when one you want to be polite, two want to get laid, and three don't want to look like a fool...

The other factor is being ready to accept that new person when you find them.  I found even though I was getting laid, I wasn't ready for a new girl in my life.  I screwed up potentially great relationships with terrific women as I just wasn't ready for them; oh well.  When I finally was, I was able to find her and 12+ years later we are together.  

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15 hours ago, El Presidente said:

Would you recommend them for Ken?  :thinking:

...I tried yesterday to sign him up for grinder but he cottoned on. 

I'm swiping left....

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Where I live (NYC) everyone uses the apps.  It's turned into the way most people meet the opposite sex. 

The good - you can meet people you would otherwise never run into in your life

The bad, you will meet people you would otherwise never have met in your life (and that would have been a good thing)

But overall I think the good way overshadows the bad.  I have met some real gems on there.  

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The last time I was dating was before the internet and I read the ‘Personal’ ads in the local hippie rag. I responded to 5 ads and actually dated one lady for a year or so.

On another note, I used the expression “my current wife” exactly once in her earshot. I still walk with a slight limp.

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Met my wife doing online dating 7 years ago. This was pre-tinder, so its changed a lot since then. Before I met the Mrs. I went on dates with about 14 other girls. Most were nondescript, a few were wonderful women who just wanted different things out of life than I did. One was 40lbs heavier than her photos. One lead to a 6 month relationship. And one stalked me at my work place. 😅

I would definitely mention cigars, especially if you smoke daily. I would also stick it in there with a few other controversial things I feel strongly about. Bland profiles will get you nowhere and its better to offend them at first glance than to take them out to eat and pay for that pleasure.

 

Oh, and have someone who know what they are doing take a few photos of you. You don't have to be the best looking guy, but a well lit and composed photo can make you stand out anyway.

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I've had some luck with the online thing - a few duds, sure, but lots of great gals too.  Make your destination a higher priority than your date - if she really wants to meet you and is girlfriend material, she won't care if it's at a dive bar that you chose because it has cheap beer, sports on TV, and allows smoking. :thumbsup:

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I met my wife on a site. I was traveling 95% and had no social life. It is what you make of it. Just like interviewing for a job, or finding cigar info on public forums, there’s lots of BS to wade through. If you lie and have nothing to offer, then that’s your problem. It’s no different than meeting people other places. Lying and pretending doesn’t get you anywhere. After some dates, I stopped spending absurd money on first dates. I took my wife to dim sum on a Sunday morning since that what I like to do... not what you do to impress a woman so you can get laid.

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On 11/26/2018 at 6:02 PM, wineguy said:

I think Ken will be fine 😉.  He just needs to act like he is interested in the other person, let her do 75% of the speaking and pretend like everything she says is incredibly fascinating. 

Opening doors and paying for dinner helps too.

 

But nowadays some women might take offense at those gestures...

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5 hours ago, multi-useless said:

I've had some luck with the online thing - a few duds, sure, but lots of great gals too.  Make your destination a higher priority than your date - if she really wants to meet you and is girlfriend material, she won't care if it's at a dive bar that you chose because it has cheap beer, sports on TV, and allows smoking. :thumbsup:

Ooooh... "duds"

I thought you wrote "dudes" at first and I thought, "Well he's just about as nonchalant as one could be having experienced that a few times, let alone once."

"Well,yes, some of your dates will be dudes of course, but if you persist you'll meet an authentic woman or two."

As previously stated, a visit to the optometrist is on my to-do list.

 

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